Friday, December 28

Boy Skills


After putting my mental list of "Girl Skills" into writing, I knew I also had to do one for the boys. I ardently love boys with all their muddy boots and sweaty palms and pyrotechnics. And there are some things*, a guy must simply know how to do.

So here's the list. Check it twice. Study up, and pat yourself on the back, you manly man, you!

1. Chop wood. You'll never know whether you've got the skill unless you've tried it--so grab an ax, boys!
2. Tie a trash bag. It sounds simple, but you'll be kicking yourself if you only tied it once and it all spilled open when you were asked to take it out.
3. Make breakfast. Whether it's for Mother's Day when you're 10 or for your lovely wife "just because." Learn how to scramble those eggs, and whip up a batch of french toast as well.
4. Wear a suit. Hold you hold yourself in a suit is what makes it look so good--trust me on this one. And you've got to know if the fit looks good on you.
5. Braid. Jk calls it "insane strings of doom" so you can call it that, too if it makes you feel better. ;) But I'm telling you this, if you can braid a little girls' hair, whether it's your baby sister, niece or daughter, you'll win HUGE points with the girls. 
6. Tie a tie. Step it up and learn the Windsor knot. And while you're at it, learn how to tie a bow tie too so you don't end up spending the morning of your wedding googling how to tie your best man's bow-tie for him.**
7. Put on the right amount of cologne. Wear cologne--it smells amazing. But please PLEASE don't douse yourself in it! Not all the girls in the hallway need to smell your AXE--just one.
8. Fold a shirt. Dress well and take care of your clothes. Bonus points if you can fold a sweater!
9. Tie knots. You should have at least 3 in your repertoire. More if you hope to own a boat some day.
10. Wrap a present. Even if it's just putting it in a bag with tissue paper.
11. Checking for done-ness. You should know what to look for in the various states of "done" on a steak. (This way you know if you really got that Medium-Rare you ordered, and you can grill up steaks to your guests' preferences.)
12. Do laundry. Know the right settings, sort and fold. 
13. Hang a picture. Find the stud, do it right, and make sure it isn't crooked. Bonus points if you can layout and hang up a gallery of picture frames.
14. Open a jar. Tip: if your muscles are a little weak from last night's work out ;) try using an upside-down spoon to pop open the lid a tad.
15. Make a fire. Without the help of a flammable liquid or nifty starter log :)

* In my humble opinion, of course!
**Yup. I'm talking to you JK. And Brad. And Nick. And Mike. And Alex.

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